You know on those nights when you are constantly waking up.
You never have those deep sleeps that you dreamt about beautiful castles, your Romeo or Juliet anymore.
It's not insomnia, it's like you just feel so insecure.
You don't even have the courage to fall alseep just like that.
You feel that nobody ever gives you the sense of security you need.
You feared having to wake up to things you are terrified of happening.
You sense and you think incessently that you may miss out on things happening while you are deep asleep.
Every now and then, I'm facing nights like these.
Sometimes, I hope I can forget about some things.
But it appeared that I can't.
I pondered over, I don't if I am just timid or I really don't wish to lose this lifestyle I'm having now.
Upon thinking back, do I feel happy this way?
That I always have to fear things happening, that I always have be suffocated and suffering in silence alone?
Will anyone truly understands what I feel?
It's not as easy as one two three or abc.
It's not like you can just give up, because everyone have feelings.
And I am one who has, like any ordinary person.
I can't believe I'm actually like this now.
Labels: my guiding star?, Where are you
